Advice: Seeking to Change where I am ministering

[Pastor Ryan]

There is a great deal of validity in what Ted has shared.

One thing I would also like to add is that if you do feel that it is time to move on, doing so in a respectful manner is just fine.

If you don't feel comfortable with or up to the challenge of giving all your reasons for leaving or everything you had a problem with or trouble they caused you, then don't.

It may not be necessary, and if don, may fall on deaf ears. If you find the right moment to share those things do it, but don't force it to happen.

The other thing I can share from personal experience is to pray for blessings on the church and administration. Forgive them for any wrongdoings to you.

It doesn't hurt you if they are blessed beyond belief, if they get a 25% pay increase, that doesn't hurt you. Pray for blessings on them and that if there are errors in their ways that they will see and correct them, or that they will seek discernment from God in their ministry.

If you hold any bitterness against them it will be hard for God to show you anything or bless you if you have bitterness in your heart.

Whether you stay or go, these are prayers you need to say.

[Paris MkVI]

I do not face the challenges you face, brother. But I want to print out this entire thread and tuck it away. God's truth and teaching is present throughout it!

All I can add is this: if you do come to a decision that you have been called to depart, depart out the "front door".

By that, I mean to handle all facets of it in a God-honoring fashion, regardless of how it is taken by your current leadership or how they respond.

If you leave, be mindful of the power of the tongue. Speak only blessing about your former church family and leadership, or speak not at all (Proverbs 15:1, 17:20).

Please know I am not suggesting that you are speaking ill, or would do so. In fact, I commend the way you are handling it here. It protects the privacy of the ministry in question as well as your family's own privacy. I merely want to, in an encouraging voice, warn you to keep a close eye and avoid that pitfall on this difficult part of your journey. A teaching I like on the subject warns thusly: "God hates this bitter fountain, which sprays venom from a poisoned well."

Truly, brother, I hear your hurting heart. Based on the information you have provided, there is a fundamental imbalance present.

Have you been given both responsibility and authority to lead and grow the ministry teams in the area you serve? This is the fundamental way to eliminate your service burnout issue, by recreating your service "DNA". We must work ourselves out of our jobs, or we'll be doing them until we die, to the detriment of the generation that follows.

If you do not have both responsibility and authority to accomplish that goal, that is another fundamental imbalance.

A personal observation - it raises a flag when leadership begins focusing on church "growth" with that word referencing numbers and stats instead of evangelism and discipleship. Why work so hard on a job Jesus said He Himself would take care of [Matthew 16:18]? There is no value in filling seats with unrepentant hearts. There is no point in bringing the dying to the hospital and not treating them.

Our ministry stands upon the thought, "It's not about building a church. It's about worshipping, co-laboring and cooperating with God as He changes and transforms lives." When we do this, growth does happen. But it is because we are cooperating with God's perfect plan, not because of anything we can do from our own strength and efforts.

If I did not see that approach in the words and actions of leadership, I too would be asking, God, do you want me elsewhere? Or am I supposed to be part of your engine for change here?

The call for the latter is a difficult one. I cannot presume to suggest which one is God's plan for you and your bride.

But I can presume to pray for you, your church, and God's clarity in His perfect plan for you two. I pray the Word of God speaks clearly to your mind and heart. I pray the thoughts and words from believers here will bring only Godly influence to your decision. I pray you feel His love and know you remain in the center of the palm of His mighty hand throughout this part of your Journey to Him.

God hears and has always had a plan to bless your serving heart, brother.

[tallorderaudio]

Hey all, long new listener-first time caller... Brace yourselves because I'm not the best at tactful communication.

Are we as Christians so hyper-focused on "getting fed" at the service that we forget about the feeding that takes place in the Church Body? In other words, The Church should be more about community and Biblical fellowship within that community; hence small groups, Bible studies, Sunday school...

This is not to negate the importance of the service itself, but I think expecting to get a weeks worth of food in a half-hour sermon just isn't realistic.

Lets define the terms and then take that to battle, as it were. Deal with each aspect of this issue based on what it is; church, spiritual growth, job, relationships. One thing at a time. If in the end these things are beyond repair, then it is OK to move on. God calls us to forgive, but sometimes reconciliation is not possible or Biblical.

Obviously, if there is tension with you and your church body then you aren't getting fed through the community OR the services. This is a problem. But I know MANY people who bounce from church to church looking for that "food" in the sermon when they should be looking for that nourishment within the community of believers.

As far as the job decision goes, I have not personally been in this situation as I have never worked FT for a church; only PT. So take my words with that grain of salt. But at some point a job is a job is a job. We leave jobs for the same reasons, really. Either personal, ethical, financial, vision/direction... same list. The difference is that here we are in a crossfire from the Enemy. Here he can fight what is usually a two front battle on one front because our churches and jobs are so intrinsically tied. Break one and the other falls too... His only goal is to destroy us.

I hope that was constructive in some roundabout way.